Choose Your Soundtrack, Don’t rely on Autoplay…

It was a Sunday morning in 2019, I was driving from a conference I attended for work in San Diego up to L.A. to see my brother lead worship at his church. He called me:

“Hey, you want to sing this song with me this morning for our 11am service?”

“Yes! I know that song really well.”

“Okay, we will get a soundcheck and stuff in between services when you arrive.”

“Okay, perfect! Excited.”

I have a friend with me, I am excited, and we drive and chat. I am in a rental car with an almost invisible gas gauge… We ran out of gas! I know, I know. Sooooo silly.

Now, I just used up all of our buffer time. We arrive at the church.

My brother meets us and takes me backstage, and we sing through the song a time or two. But the service has already started, so no sound check, no in-ear monitors to test, no on-stage practice.

We are standing backstage waiting to be called out to do this song. I start to feel my heart racing and the nerves coming on.

In the past, I have had several instances where my nerves caused my throat to seize up, and I would go into a coughing attack when I was supposed to be SINGING. I always have that in the back of my brain, “Oh no, what if my voice and body betray me!?” “What if my voice doesn’t work?”

Today, there was no time for that.

I started talking to myself.

“You were made for this! You trust the preparation. Trust the years and years of performing. You know how to do this. You’ve got this. You are amazing. You are strong. This song is a proclamation of your life. You will sing with all your heart. You know this song like the back of your hand. This is your moment.”

When I opened my mouth and sang the first note, I heard my voice ring through the 2800-seat venue. My confidence instantly rose to the occasion, and I did exactly what I wanted to do. I sang with all my heart, next to my little brother, and we blessed so many people.

Fast forward to October 2025, the choir director at our church asked me to sing a solo with the choir. “Sure, no problem.”

We didn’t practice much; I got to run through it two or three times Sunday morning before service. The first two were rough as we pieced it together, but by the third time, I nailed it.

As my time in the service neared and I stepped forward to sing, I could feel my heart rate increase, and I got nervous that my voice was not going to cooperate. And I left it all to CHANCE. I gambled.

My voice wiggled and swerved. Almost cracked. It was a bit messy. Not my greatest work. I felt a bit embarrassed. I am a professional, for goodness’ sake. This is what I do! One of my jobs is to sing. I get paid for this!

What was the difference between these two experiences?

I believe it is all about the soundtrack.

In one case, I decided the soundtrack that was going to play in my mind, and in the other instance, I allowed autoplay to feed me the soundtrack that played out in my mind.

My dears, we have the power. We have the ability to choose the soundtrack for our lives. We can wake up, and we can hit play on an ugly, dirty, old, painful song, or we can skip that nonsense and choose the soundtrack that we want to be true for this moment. For this day. For this time.

So often, we leave it all up to chance. We just wait to see what song comes up next. We walk into a vulnerable meeting, and we just let whatever song comes to our heads play.

We get into an argument with a loved one, and we play that song over and over. We are rejected by someone, and this song rolls throughout our body until every nerve ending is frayed.

We actually have the ability and the choice to change the song. Flip the script. Sing a new song. Write a new lyric.

I want this for you, my dear. I want you to learn yourself so well and recognize when you have done it again. When you allow autoplay to set the tone and atmosphere of your life, versus you making your own strong, powerful playlist.

What do you want to be the soundtrack of your life? Don’t gamble, don’t leave it up to fate. Let’s be intentional to press play on our very OWN song.

From my Heart to Yours,